I'm at his house. He has VELCRO shoes. I'm too desperate to leave...I may need help in thee life dept
So yesterday I was on craigslist and I saw a listing for a sofa-cum-bed. I knew what they meant...
HE had a tribal tattoo tramp stamp, jasmine.
Just walked by a yard full of girls wearing bikinis. I did my best to stare.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I found a wheel chair. there is now a high chance im going to be fired from this job
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
Bitch looked at my dick and said "I thought they called you horsecock, I'm already disappointed"
I told you that line would get her home never said it was a good idea
I have their Unicorn picture in my shirt, and I just threw a Bud Light Platinum bottle through their window. We need to go now.
I hope your pay increase has gone through because I might need bail. This is not what I dreamed adulthood would be like.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Youre the drunk baby that everyone wants to take care of.
Well I met my booty call's parents by accident, so that happened.
And thanks! There are perks to polyamory. And birthday orgies are one of them
I'm just gonna put on a documentary and throw up
Wanna get drunk and make some bad decisions?
Are you calling me a bad decision?
I had a date last night. His dog threw up in his bed while we were having sex in it.
Randomize