ambylanc
what?
there was an amgbulance. iw ish i was in it.
My roommate made me go home after I mooed at fat girls at the gas station.
I tried giving you a bj last night and all you could manage was "Haha that tickles" and "in the morning"
NOLA update. Went to Corey Smith at the house of blues last night. Drank PBR and took lots of shots of Jack. Too drunk, cabbed it to the hotel and fell asleep while having sex. Not my finest moment. Now I'm in court. I can't wait to be your attorney.
Boise Idaho, where you have a one night stand with someone from your town 3 states away and run into them the day you return...
Because of my cut offs, my brother is convinced I fucked a girl so hard she forgot to take her pants. Fairly accurate.
lost her for two hours. she was banging a russian guy in her car in the parking lot. he told her she was majestic.
Just busted the chick who slept with my boyfriend with alcohol. God I love being an RA.
He literally just peed in a trash can in our room. It didn't even have a bag in it
You still owe me a blowjob for knowing more about hurricanes than you.
Good news my life of crime finally paid off
I wore the clothes I got arrested in last night to work today.....there is no where but up from here!
He just ate a tooth whitening strip...
Like wanna sit on your face while you speak German hot
Irony: drinking your pre workout supplement out of the cup your Krispy Kreme doughnut holes came in.
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