i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
found an empty one..2nd door on the right...i'm already naked.
it's like i need an invisible sign across my boobs that says "DOESN'T HAVE DADDY ISSUES" that only old men can see
I found her under my bed eating airplane pretzels.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I vaguely remember taking a shit behind the shed before I started puking over the fence. No more Xanax.
what is the most politically correct way to ask if he still hangs out with the guy that has blue hair and make meth in his car?
We have sex, then we talk about foreign policy. Its a win-win.
Theres a midget tsa agent. Just an observation
Seriously I just dipped a banana in vodka I really need to stop drinking
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also, if you all get arrested i'm coming to laugh at you because i don't have the money for bail.
DICK PUNCH EXTRAVAGANZAAAAAA!!!!!
he fucked me with his goalie mask on. it was like sleeping with Darth Vader
A very confused plastic surgeon just called. Apparently I called asking how much it costs to get a vodka funnel installed straight to my brain...
It's getting harder and harder to fake orgasms as I get older.
Have you had an orgasm with an n95 mask on yet? It was better than being choked.
Randomize