Lesson learned: don't hide your vodka in your little brothers toy box.
We video chatted for almost two hours. But I woke up with puke on my keyboard. The question of the day: were we still chatting when I vommed? No idea.
I just fell for a fake 50 dollar bill in a urinal. Fuck pittsburgh
She started to tell me how she goes to a shrink, so I started thinking how to sneak out of her place, then she said part of it was for her sex addiction, long story short she's got her clit peirced n I just got laid
I hope my shame shaped pee stain outside your door goes away soon.
I hate that he uses me for something other than sex. What does he think I am? His girlfriend? Ha.
I was giving this guy head and he stopped me to look me in the eyes and say "you have a gift"
Don't worry, I could have been accepted their by waving my dick at the admissions building.
Boys should be on-demand - like, once you select one, he's yours for the next 24-hours
things were going awesome until jimmy put out a cigarette in the everclear.
You sent me a picture of curly fries with no explanation attached. This is the first time you've texted me in 2 months.
I mean. I'm excited for the Seahawks too. I just love nachos.
Of course I'm going to see her again. She had waterproof handcuffs in her shower.
I made it out of the house. Success.
It's not better out here. I'm at Target hyperventilating in the aisles.
Only thing I have going for me is jacking off, weed, and saturdays
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