Wait, we're on the hunt for addys and explosives. They're both in this house somewhere.
Bro, i just sang journey's "dont stop beleavin" at mcdonalds. and the guy was sooo impressed he gave us free food. God i love america
Make good choices ;) This is your automated cockblock message
We thought she was passed out on the toilet, but she raised her head to tell me the word I couldn't remember was "empathize." Then she puked blood and passed out.
E drugging s springing. Ease dnt Kate. To t e. ess e I meant thou.
By the way if you come home and I'm not wearing pants, just go with it. I didn't have the energy to go searching for some.
I like to get drunk just like anyone else but not to the point of sticking a rubber tube up my asshole
PLEASE DON'T BE HEARTLESS COME AND GET ME FROM THE BAR I'M HIGH AS SHIT AND I LOST MY SHOES
Debating going to the grocery store with my vibrator still in, cause I can't stand the idea of it out. Lets do some risk/reward
This is not a costume party, I'm just wearing fairy wings.
Of course you are.
Just woke up. Naked. Under an animal pelt. With a girl. I've never met her. She's pretty naked too.
I hope none of us try to run for public office one day
tuscaloosa is terrifying
like people here are just empty shells of drugs and sin
there is no mercy here
Remember when I made out with that stranger at the bar on my 21 in chicago? I wonder how he's doing
It wasn't my fault.
You let her suck your neck. Yes it was your fault.
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