I can tuck mytits in my pants
That bar we were at last night smelled like cougars. Virginia Slims, Aqua Net and Summer's Eve.
Lol speaking of weird...he just sent me a naked pic of himself that said "meow" at the bottom.
Motor boating, judging by the amount of lipstick I found I would say between 6 to 8 times
shes trying to book us all flights to Ireland..I let her get mine and yours but stopped her when she tried booking the guy next to her at the library
I'm doing it for my vagina. You should understand that
Just made a Xanax and ginger ale smoothie. Oh Thursday you are good to me..
I take your giggles as a yes to operation McLaxitives?
I bet it kind of sucks while you do community service I'm getting blown in the shower. haha
He realized that I was watching deadliest catch while we were jerkin off on FaceTime.
She brought over her portable harddrive and we dueled with porn. This relationship is too beautiful to last.
I'm tired of the topic. I sent him a pic of my vagina to change it.
Her car is covered in frozen vomit, and she lost her iPhone. I'm also pretty sure I smoked crack last night. Rest in peace 2014.
I can't. I'm going camping this weekend. I do have a life outside of your dick.
So, my first week in Saskatchewan ended with me drinking moonshine and getting eaten out in a tractor. I already love it here!
Randomize