dude. i was so high. i watched shrek in russian.
TBS has betrayed me by telling me tyler perry is funny
I need to take "lollipop" off of every single one of my playlists cause it makes me wanna suck dick.
you're dressed like that and you're on the rag, that's false advertisment
He is like the real live version of the state fair..
i was drunk and our names rhymed...what was i supposed to do?
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
In case you were wondering, transporting lube in a ziploc bag is just as bad of an idea as it sounds.
It's all sex hats and vagina bandages with you isn't it?
I'll hold a taco with my boobs for you
We played Rock Paper Scissors to see who would have to go down on the other person.
Apparently, Lolla sends you an email every time you use your wristband to buy a beer.
21 new emails...yikes
I'm happy I peed in your laundry basket last night
It's not even 8pm on a Friday and I've already got a guy to tell me how big his penis is. Watched anything good on Netflix lately?
Yah. I'm gonna lay you down and feed you grapes, except I'm gonna replace grapes for my balls
Randomize
