I dont shave on purpose to keep myself from being slutastic!! it usually works
When he took off his pants i accidently shouted "that is one small wiener," and thats when he left
you'd think someone with a dick that small would take what he could get
only my mom would pack illegal paraphernalia in a care package..
apparently the dude across the street has been dead for like a month. now I feel bad about pissing on his lawn
For your information i will be shotgunning whiskey on may 21st.
You just handed me your ATM card and wrote your PIN number on a dollar bill and said "for bail money."
And then as he was trying to conceal his boner from everybody, you said aloud "just grab your cock and get out of the pool"
As an added bonus, you will have a "25 blowjobs a month" voucher, expiring thirty days after the first initial bj.
He came over to use the microwave, said he needed to heat up some urine.
Did I get stoned on a sunday afternoon and speak to someone on the phone for an hour about cats and their behaviour? Glad you asked. And yes.
Oh great. I guess I'm second on that list now that we've confirmed she's not a lesbian AND that was her sister.
Hey it's Males-You-Probably-Wish-You-Hadnt-Had-Sex-With Monday. MYPWYHHSWM
Road head absolutely translates. That's the beauty of road head... It's so portable!
I texted him back and I am so nervous I may vomit up all of the soup I just ate.
how do I say, without sounding slutty... That I can take a dick?
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