I think I speak chipmunk. Odd.
Are you high?
No. That's why it's odd
we got blazed and looked up peoples criminal records
i just taught a 3 year ld how to do a jager bomb, i cant wait to have kids
I want to frame my negative pregnancy test.
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
I just met his other fuck buddy...I am thinking of befriending her just to fuck with him...manuplating my roommates into hating each other is boring me i need something else to do
do you remember yelling at the waitress that you were a power bottom?
the night ended with taco bell and tears
We are, if nothing else, classy enough to leave our 10 mini bottles of wine in a polite line on the floor of the movie theater.
I'm sorry but I require more work than your hamster. I need food, a minimum of 5 pillows, and I need to be played with daily.
I'm about to fuck a girl in an old school Tony Kukoc Bulls jersey. About to earn my third championship ring in sex
ERIN AND I ARE GETTING MATCHING VIBRATORS. I'M PEER PRESSURING YOU INTO JOINING THE CLUB. Besides we're the three best friends that anyone could have, you better not ruin that by being a pussy and not treating your pussy to awesomeness. That is all.
...Just hit my fuck buddy with my car.
dude the last time we saw him was 2 nights ago when he was yelling that the trees were naked or some shit then he ran into the forest. I think its time for a search party
I got there and she was on her balcony drinking out of a bottle of vodka and smoking a cigar.
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