A joint and a Nerds Rope = breakfast of champions for the unemployed
dude...i just woke up in ****'s bed!
doesn't he have a girlfriend???
yeah...who do you think woke us up...
The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes.
Sitting in class thinking wow im glad im not hungover...and then i realized im still drunk.
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Jesus people on campus asked me what i do for joy. I said i love sinning especially pre-marital sex.
i'm almost done photoshopping my face on his wife. it's a done deal
Wedding update: no alcohol, 75% of people have left, no one is dancing, no single groomsmen, and it's 5:30. I'm going the fuck home to drink by myself.
The bartender gave me a roll of masking tape so I could tape my heels to my feet so I wouldn't lose them when i went drunk running later that night
I haven't seen any of my friends sober in months. We have classes together.
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There's never a time that i stay at this apartment that when i wake up in the morning and sit outside to smoke a cigarette that i don't feel ashamed of myself.
He was so good, that I'm pretty sure he fucked his religion into me. P.S. I'm Jewish now.
That basically sounds like the worst party of my life, and I'm including my brother's World of Warcraft themed birthday party.
Mom told me you snuck booze into a concert in a cheez its box...I have never been prouder to be related to you
Drunk Sam makes promises that Sober Sam can't keep
You tried to use him as a battering ram. I'm 99% certain that's why he left.
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