I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
I saw a penis in my cereal this morning. do you think my cheerios are like professor trelawney's tea leaves?
one can only hope.
2 v-cards in one night. impossible is nothing.
I'm going to but the new Playboy with Chelsea Handler on the cover. I'm pretty sure it's the only time buying a Playboy will make me gayer...
he kept asking me if i had been in a pool or a lake recently, i didnt want to say i know where the swimmers ear came from. shower sex.
Can we go to Home Depot next week? Drunk Kim broke my toilet with a hammer.
The site I use to study flash cards keeps showing ads for truck companies hiring drivers. It's like the site is saying "hey, we all know there's no hope for you, just give up and Become a truck driver."
Thank you for caring about my cervix.
You knew you'd end up at his house the minute you emptied the bowl of condoms into your purse.
Theyll love you, its bunch of older ladies who drink whisky and sours and talk about the sex seans in Game of Throwns
tried to make it look like I had been conscious/awake and out all day when I stumbled into cvs at 6pm to buy plan B
update: I failed
What exactly is it about Doctor Who thigh high socks with a matching shirt that says "take me I'm yours!"
After all this I still can't spell gonorrhoea without autocorrect
being broke is really keeping my alcoholism in check
thanks for letting me have sex in your bed, too bad you didn't get to yet
who are you?
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