DUDE. I'm missing my big toenail. My bed has blood all over it. WHAT DID WE DO LAST NIGHT?
I don't know, but I chipped my tooth and I'm wearing different underwear.
Blackout barefoot maybe pregnant
Good decisions....
Just got blue box Mac and cheese things are looking up
there was a trapeze. enough said
i got excepted to unl lol
You mean "accepted".
Tonight we are playing Scuba-Keg. Getting keg now. I'll explain when i get home.
idk but i have you stored in my phone as 'guy with beard doing body shots'
well i did drunkenly flip his snowmobile going 90, so i can kind of see why hes mad
Well I squeegeed the puke off your arm at the gas station
I didn't plan on sleeping with him until he told me his mom is deaf.. Then I felt bad.
My first drink last night was a 2-liter of jameson and coke. So hung over it hurt to put my pants back on
There was an Altoids can full of urine in the bathroom. I do not want to know what was going on in there.
I'm truly not mad that he's at a strip club, it's that he couldn't look far enough into the future to figure out how to get himself home from one
That moment when you cant decide between eating spaghetti or a Popsicle for breakfast
Drunk purchased a negligee, plan b, keds and Himalayan salt shot glasses.. there’s only one reasonable purchase there, and we both know it’s not the sneakers
Almost gave myself a concussion stealing a stuffed unicorn hanging on a street sign but hey I got home safe
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