from now on, im only gona ahve sex with my boyfriend.
What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
too bad you can't see the clap by looking at her face.
she is a standing ovation.
After you pregamed and were plastered you saw the cop was parked illegally so you gave him a citizens arrest
no, literally. he fb chatted me and said "since you're online i figured we could bang tonight?"
we are currently watching a singalong porn...just thought you should know
No, I don't think your idea of offering shots in exchange for bonus points to your history professor at B-Dubs was a good idea. Especially after you later told him that you would "tap that" in regards to his wife.
Finishing last nights 1.5L of wine and beef jerky for breakfast. Work looms, ever the prickly bitch.
There was booze on his face and I wanted it. I'm not sorry.
How is it that I've hooked up with not one but two guys in the children's section of a bookstore tonight?
wow thanks for pushing me towards an older man
you gotta start somewhere if you're going to be a trophy wife
I get so many dick pics from him...He has an unhealthy obsession with his own penis...
I have the overwhelming need to take care of him. Both with my vagina and like emotionally.
First contact since we had sex and it's to get my HBO password. I sure pick winners huh
A piece of your chipped nail polish just fell out of my crotch.
Randomize
