I'm gunna smoke cigs today. I feel like I'm in that powerful and gritty mood which requires them
I'm calling you out on twitter if you don't come over right now.
i'm only drinking out of pineapples from now on.
i gave him head before the novacaine wore off...i think his penis touched my lung
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just had sex with a midget and didnt wrap it... were totally gonna have a tv show :)
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
He tried to slow-dance with me in bed. IN BED.
I just took a shower and I feel like 20 pounds of sex just came off of me.
we smoked out of your homemade aunt jamima bong
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've decided to be proactive and make a sex playlist on my phone to avoid any awkward moments in my upcoming slutty summer
I don't save the phone numbers of guys I don't like. That way it's a surprise when a random number texts me and tells me I have great tits.
Too bad, iambic pentameter is a drunk specialty of mine.
Know we haven't talked but having an orgy party on the 20th if you're interested. If not, disregard this text.
Who is this?
i just want to die with dignity and clean teeth, is that too much to ask?
He ate me out in a golf cart while I watched the sunset. You are so right, golf skirts do provide amazing access.
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