Mr ***** is in bed with his super hot wife giving her 18 inches of pleasure
I just remembered we were doing butt clenching exercising with bar straws last night
I wish you could order shots online.
I was so high I couldnt even listen to music i was terrified of the potential knowledge i would gain.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i DID NOT walk around with my knees bent and my hands behind my back with long spandex and underarmour pretending to be Apollo Ono
Im drinking a large pickle jar full of Emergency, water and left over pickle juice and I dont care.
Even the paramedic said "what a way to kill a party"
At least she'll always have a story about the time she showed up to the emergency room drunk and covered in chocolate syrup on her birthday.
I love shooting for the middle. Those girls never wake up well.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I dressed up as a breathalyzer test for Halloween; never had so many straight dudes blow me before!
I don't know if I want to fuck him or punch him in the face.
I just got woken up by that guy wearing a Krispy Kreme hat giving out donuts
there's a 50/50 chance the night will end in alcohol-induced rituals of satanic nature
You can’t homewreck what the Lord hath brought together.
So I justmade it back home and was greeted to a squirrel in my dorm... Last time I let my friends rent it out for a party.
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