He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
I'm smoking weed out of a trumpet
I just did a slip and slide down the hall way of my apartment building
Tie
great sex! but now the fight over who sleeps on the wet spot starts.
everything was going good until you started showing off the pictures of poop you took with your phone
Her vagina smelled like bad decisions
Would it be cruel if i sold xanax instead of adderall to freshman unfamiliar to the drug-taking profession?
the vast amounts of cleavage i'm sporting to my final says "no, I didn't study but don't worry I've got something lined up for when I don't graduate".
they call him Oral-B. enough said
on the way to the hospital you kept asking if we could stop at the bar first. then you proceeded to puke out the window
as you might have guessed from my lack of texts, the herpes have calmed down.
She failed the Charleston discretion test, although puking in her armpit was very innovative.
And I am bleeding like slutty girl #1 In a horror movie
Dude mama brought home the bacon, i got his HBO account i guess that makes up for his by par skills in bed.
We woke up today with 24 donuts, a tie, two jugs of vodka that we traded an extra sandwich for, and a british boy
You were so drunk last night that you fell thru the bathroom door at the bar, ripping it off the hinges in the process. But, your birthday tiara stayed on thru the whole thing. I'd call it a succcessful evening. Happy birthday kiddo!
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