She has an incinerator in her basement. Have you ever incinerated used condoms?
Lmao what?
It's a yes or no question.
I just used an app to identify a song that was playing in the background of a porno. May god bless your soul steve jobs.
I have to have sex with him again. I feel like I need to train him so no other girl experiences that bad of sex.
When it gets to the point that I'm more comfortable being naked at his house than my own, it's time to readdress the fuckbuddyship.
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
I'm still not completely convinced I'm not pregnant. I just dipped beef jerky in cream cheese frosting.
I'm staying in tonight, it's my Christmas present to my liver.
I don't want a baby! I JUST WANT AN ORGASM THAT ISN'T SELF INFLICTED.
Not only did she fulfill a life long dream of mine of banging in a library, she bought me subway for lunch. I feel like I got the best gold star ever today.
We woke up on vday and got high and played frisbee in our living room for a couple hours and then had sex. It was probably the most romantic valentine's day i've ever had
I'm like a saiyan, every time I get trashed I come back stronger
You seem like the type to go to a craft sale baked out of your mind. I like you.
i just remember singing the theme song from 2 and 1/2 men to my hair
Got so drunk I broke my sink in half. Not. Lying.
No, this year you're all getting coupons for things like "no yelling because you had sex in my apartment" or "the last beer."
Randomize
