Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
i love that we sang a whole new world together while you carried me through campus
I hope so. I just start to question my lifestyle when i pee on coffee tables
She threw all the patio furniture in the pool saying she was building a castle.
once you started introducing yourself as "running-bear" i knew you were beyond fucked up
Dude tried texting you during but she threw my pants too far away
I punched some guy in the face for being an asshole then later I went to say sorry and give him a hug and he started making out with me. How was your new years?
Not good... He ate my chips. Thats not a sex analogy for anything. My actual potato chips... gone. I lost on both ends.
He says he invented a new sex move called The Redbird that we can only do when I'm on my period. Should I be concerned?
All I want to do on Facebook today is comment on people I knew in high schools profile pictures and tell them how much uglier they are now.
I pulled a muscle last night drunk dirty snapchatting him
I couldn't fall back asleep it was too bright so I just took my sports bra off and put it over my eyes
So how does one go about leaving their family vacation to hang out with someone they met on tinder
I planned to shave today but it's Friday the 13th I might cut something
#tbt to when you let me put plastic wrap on your balls and hum a little song
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