Yeah but his hole really smells sometimes
just shaved my legs at the gas station bathroom before going to the club. is that too ghetto?
Why am I in a dog kennel?
It was for your own safety
It took my four years to get this degree, and 4 hours to lose it, My parents are not impressed.
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I have no idea. I woke up naked on someones toilet locked in the bathroom with two baby kittens.
I think i smell like relationship. That's my problem.
I made her a sippy cup with eggnog and whiskey. My meditation app told me to go the extra mile for someone today, so I did.
I sexy timed too hard and there is an ass shaped piece of a ping pong table now missing bc of it. How am I allowed to leave the house without a helmet?
I swear god is testing me by giving me awesome guys with tiny penises
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I put on slutty clothes under my normal clothes, im like fucking super slutwoman
Best superhero ever to exist
Shout out to this stomach virus for helping me prepare for whatever slutty Halloween costume I decide to wear.
Having sex with him is like eating mayo. Don't think about it, just do it. It's worth it.
I had the good sense not to tell her that my summer goal is to get fucked by a med student while wearing a party dress and sparkly shoes
Do you think the hole in the ceiling will count against our security deposit?
If I didn't have booty calls, my apartment would never get clean
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