Drunken horseback riding is the absolute worst decision i've ever made in my life.
the fact that you could barely do more than slur incoherent sentences didn't stop you from correcting her grammar
She had one unshaved part on her vagina that she called "the soul patch" I just didn't know what to think
The boat wouldn't start, so we brought it back to her house and we've been sitting in it in her driveway for the past 5 hours drinking beer and yelling at peoplee.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Who knew there were so many rules and judgements about laying on a kitchen floor. I'm all like I'm resting. It just happens to be on a kitchen floor.
the bar didnt serve shots so jim ordered us jaeger neat. it worked.
You asked me what the point was. Told me your were dying alone and then had me take you and Wendy's where you bought 3 meals and ate them in about 10 minutes saying you didn't care if you got fat...
Of course I'll be there. I never miss an opportunity to smell like cigarettes, cheap beer, and shame.
Of course it may just be the context. A dish of dog food would look lovely next to your breasts.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just go read my twitter... There's a play by play. It starts with a penis pump
She used my 100 Ways To Cope With Stress handout to wipe puke off her face
Ohhh the usual. Laying in bed reflecting on my decisions
Do not buy a prego test at the Walgreens you frequent. It's awkward. Just trust me.
You chose shitty college football over this pussy and my cute little mouth. That's your fault.
I'm too hungover to Google him and try to save face.
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