I decided to name my penis gatorade...is it in you?
When she sits down, she uses her fat rolls like an arm rest.
Hes far too high and trying to explain daylight savings time to me. Help?
I didn't know people actually cried after sex.
So we are lighting beer bottles on fire and breaking them in half to make glasses
That sounds dangerous
Don't worry......were wearing oven mits.
The house is trashed, there is porn scattered everywhere like an easter egg hunt and the blow up doll is sleeping on the couch downstairs. someone covered her up.
What sexual position says im sorry for your loss?
She suggested that I come visit her in Europe and hook up with the heteroflexible Korean who sits next to her in class. Polylove is the best love.
A surprise thumb up the ass and I'm wide awake. She was right, no need for caffine pills I could fight ninjas now.
Operation "Inform her family she stars in a sadistic lesbian porn film" is in full effect. She picked the wrong guy to cheat on.
Lol yeah. Because I just woke him up to blow him for being hot.
It's only just- an eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth, a nude for a nude
Like pizza and mermaids make up about 1/3 of my thoughts on the weekends.
Unintionally got shitfaced at study group this week. The waitress brought out a fishbowl of long Island iced tea. Challenge accepted.
Took my nervous poop earlier then expected it's gonna be a good day
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