dont worry your back hair reminds me of angel wings
I had a talk with my mom about respecting myself and not acting like a whore so she will rip my nose ring out if she somehow sees that picture
mimosa in my stainless steel water bottle. going green is not that bad.
it's so much work when my dad takes my car to get fixed, i had to take out the bottles, condoms, and my pipe
Bottle rocket just missed my head by about 3 inches. Of course I'm being safe
just a question.. totally understand if you dont know what im talking about.. but.. do you have my funnel? i think i tucked it in to your bed last night.
we're using his nephews tonka truck toy as a cooler for the beer
Is YOLO really just a socially acceptable way to say you enjoy putting things up your nose?
ummm im also counting the $14 dollars I gave the old guy to pay for the cab I called for him to take to the hospital last night as part of ur present.
She yanked on my limp dick and I yelped, to which she slurred something about starting it like a lawn mower
there's cocaine on the ipad again........... was your sister here last night?
Thank you. I woke up with a beard hair in my mouth. Super classy.
i was asked to be gay of honor by three different girls and NONE of the groomsmen at any of the weddings is open to experimenting. i mean whats the point then.
I woke up at 4am because the neighbors cat managed to sneak into my bed. HOW THE FUCK DOES THIS STUFF HAPPEN TO
It started off with wine and ended up with me in only my pearls and heels. It was about the classiest sexual experience I've ever had.
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