farters have to be the big spoon...
he's afraid if he sleeps with me i'll go all lavender brown on him
Have you come up with a team name for the beer pong tournament on Saturday?
We can be the stepdads. If anyone asks why say because we beat you and you hate us.
thank you for introducing me to everyone on chat roulette as I was passed out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I envy the lives of milf's kids, the little kid grabs her tits and she just laughs and says not now
I just won 10 dollars from out chugging the bar tender and I found out that the baby aint mine in the last hour. I don't even care if l get laid tonight any more.
Never visiting again. You guys drink like immortals
I shame-fucked to Hotel California, don't tell me about priorities.
I'm just gonna pretend you didn't ask me that. I'll sweep that shattered moment of our friendship under the shame rug.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I refused to call him anything but Drake eyebrows all night.
I'm supposed to be at work in 10 min, I just woke up and am 45 min away...tinder for the win
That's not the problem. The problem is I thought I was over him but he smells nice today.
we woke up when the front wall of the house caught fire.
You spilled your drink, and we laughed so hard my boobs popped out of my shirt.
I just don't understand what you plan on accomplishing there except for losing all vestiges of post-freshman year dignity
Randomize