If you were a Panda and I were a Koala and we had a baby, it'd be a falafel. Just think about that.
I told her I would melt her with my mustache. Needless to say, he pants were soon off.
Just saw ur first draft of ur suicide note.
You spelled "worthless" wrong.
I actually kind of like the booze poos. It's like a colon cleanse. I feel skinnier.
The worst part of it is that he's not the first man I've fucked with 2+ chihuahua's.
i need to find a notary that isn't going to turn me in for blatantly lying to the us and chilean governments
I said I usually like going out for coffee before torturing someone's genitals. He said he understood.
Rumble strips road head = magical
First memory of my senior year: Going into registration still drunk from last night.
I found out his moms name, maiden name, profession, and office location, his dads name and profession, his home phone, picture of their house, all of his work profiles, and the cost of their house. All I'm trying to do is find his damn twitter
You think you're smart. You're pretending to be asleep to save yourself from my hormonal pms mood swings. Unfortunately that only works against bears.
We watched Purple Rain and then proceeded to have sex while listening to the album. If that's not exactly how Prince would want people to honor him, I don't know what is
Glitter fights sound a lot funner in theory.
my ex logged me out of his netflix so im gonna fuck his bestfriend as revenge
they are cutting me off...little do they know I am making a 75 yr old man i named Herbert buy me drinks now...no shame at 11 am...
Randomize
