a guy tried paying for lapdances with cds, who uses those anymore?
I dont think yelling "Grab your dicks, time for pics!" helped your case either.
was his dick as big as our hopes and dreams?
What should I wear?
Uhhhhh...idk? it's a gay bar
I found something that says "i'm here to party, but not fuck guys."
Some guy in lab is humming along to a Sara Barrilles song. Or maybe I'm just hearing the song echoing in his huge, gaping vagina.
My time here is complete. I think I have now thrown up in every major degree programs building
We used a snorkel as a funnel. Can you say desperate?
I wouldn't call that a crush. It was more of a minor brain aneurism.
i need to stop establishing animals as safe words. Giraffe and Penguin are really awkward words to say during sex
i almost threw up on his dick. its like icarus, flew too close to the sun. except the sun is his dick and my throat was icarus
I don't know. I just have an affinity for nudity when I'm drunk.
How the hell am I supposed to tell that to a group of eight year olds?! It was three in the afternoon for fucks sake!
He came all over her clothes we have to leave
Dude get over here. Steven brought super soakers filled with colored vodka.
This whole brainwashing thing is easy!
What the fuck was I thinking eating an entire tub of potato salad on acid. My stomach today bro
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