im about as happy as oj after his trial
How young is too young to ask my kid to make me a drink?
Pro tip: Don't start playing Bejeweled on Facebook while waiting for your Adderall to kick in. Unless you have the next 9 hours free.
we were on a sandy mattress. i was wearing a sweatshirt with a poodle on it and eating a whopper jr. i wouldn't have fucked me either.
I'm pre-party power houring. It's so catchy I couldn't not do it
5th glass of wine. There's pictures of Jesus everywhere. It's like you're constantly reminded of your sins here.
Dude, this guy showed up with a 40 and stayed for two days. I want that lack of responsibility
My time here is complete. I think I have now thrown up in every major degree programs building
I still count it as showing your tits. Even though the wall was the only one who saw anything. Your boyfriend was pissed.
When we tried to make a video I set the camera to 3sec pictures accidentally so instead of a movie we have a flipbook of our sex.
How are you feeling?
I mean, shattered dignity aside, not bad.
He brought me flowers and then spanked me with a Doctor Who paddle. Pretty good night, as these things go.
Awwwwwww!
He just jumped up off the couch, screamed "ITS OVER NINE THOUSAND!" And then attempted to fly out the window like a bird. I don't know nor do I care to know what just happened
I'm in the liquor store and fucking "Wannabe" by the Spice Girls is playing. IM ALREADY ASHAMED OF MY REASON FOR BEING HERE, GIVE ME A BREAK.
Theres just something about today that says lets get drunk, dont you think?
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