There really should be an "avoid ghetto" option on my GPS.
I got a chicken sandwich and a frosty out of her. Better then having sex
He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.
He asked if I wanted a dutch rudder. 1.) Who says that? 2.) How exactly does one do that with a girl?
every single time I see a picture of the two of them on facebook, I want to just call her and scream "your boyfriend said I give the best head on the east coast". But I've been told that would be inappropriate.
But seriously who drew a dick on a tortilla and nailed it to the door?
Ok let me just clear up this blowjob thing first so we can talk about your grandpa
Virgins should have to wear a badge. This burden is too heavy...
Having to crawl on my hands and knees because I woke up with a mysterious broken foot this morning...
She yelled out "MCDREAMY" mid orgasm
As a courtesy going forward if you could not bang in my house that would be nice
DO NOT PREHEAT THE OVEN THIS MORNING! WE STARTED USING IT AS A WINE STASH AROUND MIDNIGHT.
He said he would get me a helmet and bedazzle it with my name and address so the cabs would know where to take me
Our livers get a hall pass for 2020, right?
Is it too much to ask to have a life partner who has both male and female sex organs that looks cute and sounds like a female Antonio Banderas and likes to get weird?
Randomize
