Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
I just saw that your im name has '4eva' in it. Your man card has been revoked.
you threatened to puke on the table cause they didnt serve eggs Benedict
My penis has a 100% approval rating. He has never received a formal complaint. If you'd like to file one, you can go fuck yourself.
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
Thanks for walking over, a conversation about David Bowie's dick as a muppet is exactly what my day was missing.
Just purchased ketchup, body wash, and lube. Hope you're ready for the post-memorial-day-cookout-shower-anal.
The cab driver was nice enough to let you finish your beer in the car, but you crossed the line when you started to pee in the empty bottle
I think my staff loses a little bit of respect for me every time you're in town. I may have to puke at work ...again.
He asked me if the reason I slept around is because I grew up in a broken home. I am so done fucking Christians.
You'd be proud! I didn't lose my id this time... It got confiscated
I had the bathroom of girls sing you happy birthday while you puked. I couldn't stop laughing. They were all so supportive
1. so the new neighbor u called dibs on.. I'm sorry..but not really. 2. She lactates, I guess that happens when you have a kid less then 5 months ago.... WTF!! 3. Is it fucked up I'm craving Ceral & Milk now?
Honestly my life is shambles over a married man who looked like a fuckin NERD ON HIS WEDDING DAY
Just had a threesome for the second time in my life. I don;t even enjoy threesomes. Too much effort.
HOW DO THESE THINGS KEEP HAPPENING TO YOU?
Randomize