If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
Hows this for an invention: a toilet that weighs your poop
I though she ruined it by crying, then I realized it wasn’t a tear, it was my great aim. It turned out to be beautiful.
I called him Han Solo during sex, he looked at me like he was mortified then I realized he came.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he just booty called me in advance instead of waiting til 3 am when hes trashed. i think thats really considerate and gentlemanlike.
New dating criteria: what kind of ex will this person be?
I think the imperative here is that I literally knocked down a sorority house with the force of my dick.
I reek of vagina.. My cab driver commented.
A Morman just tried to recruit me and I told him "Trust me, you don't want me"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't know how guys can take themselves seriously when they see themselves naked
well I've taken an Uber to my weed dealers twice in the past 2 weeks so it's going well since I sold my car
I feel like the dump I just dropped is the most successful thing I've done so far today.
I love the smell of your bedroom. It smells of a mixture of cherries, leather, and unrequited homosexual desire.
no we just smoked too much weed and listened to the tarzan soundtrack. phil collins is amazing
One singular head for man, one giant climax for mankind
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