Also do the "tongue the pee-hole" thing.
she uses ice cubes and hums anything I want. Last night was Welcome to the jungle. it wasnt lost on me shes a puma. no shame in that 30+ game.
Man now I have poo on my blackberry!!!
brownberry?
FYI angry masturbation is not as cool angry sex
then out of nowhere we heard a voice yell "Fuck that pussy!"
The Fresno prostitute seemed offended all I wanted from her was directions back to the freeway.
Thanks for talking me down from peeing on his window last night.
I am now curious as to how you would have aimed.
we didnt even make it to the club...the two of us were sharing a plastc bag in the taxi puking into it.
I'm currently trying to decide if crown or wild turkey will hurt worse coming back out through my nose later.
I CAN CONTROL MY GERBIL WITH MY BREATH. HE FOLLOWS THE SMELL. PROBABLY WOULDNT BE AS EXCITING IF I WASNT HIGH OFF MY ASS, BUT STILL
According to the red cross, I'm not suppose to do anything strenuous for the next 24 hours. That means you're on top.
So I'm going to regale you with a tale of someone who went out, was fed way to many shots, got super wasted and now has a date with one of the security guards from the building but has no idea what his name is. That someone is me
So, my eyeglasses somehow ended up in my nightstand drawer and they're covered in lube.
FUCKIN BIRDS ARE CHIRPING AT 4 IN THE MORNING. THE SUN ISN'T RISING YET MOTHERFUCKERS, GO BACK TO YOUR NESTS.
I must be pretty memorable. I was walking past this dude and he goes "There's the Scotch Girl." I have ZERO clue who he is, but I'm definitely the Scotch Girl.
Randomize
