I think the universe is against us being together. Or maybe it's just god's way of telling me there is a bigger dick out there for me.
she then came into the room and yelled I'M GOING TO BE A COCK BLOCK for 5 minutes
SHE has hooked up with both me and my sister. I don't even know what to say. If she goes for my parents next I may have to kill her
Well, think of it this way, if this were 200 years ago your father would have received the most goats in all the village for your fertile loins. Think about that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why is there a school picture of an 8 year old boy in my pocket...?
I'm at a restaurant. I am NOT about to discuss my asshole over the phone.
I've made out with more people in 2014 than I did the whole fall semester
I stole us four large rolls of toilet paper from the hotel carts. I feel like the breadwinner in this relationship
Dude, i just watched a drag queen dropkick a motherfucker. this is a good night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oohh. Then yes, he is the Alpha Fuckboy.
ANIME MEN ARE MAKING ME QUESTION MY SEXUALITY AGAIN
I never said it was inaccurate, I said I hate you.
You know its a good morning when you wake up with blonde hair extensions in your pocket. . .
I ate all your munchie Mac and Cheese cause you left me on the lawn. If you don't want it to happen gain, drag my drunk ass inside next time
What the fuck dude?
Sorry bro...
YOU HUMPED ME FOR AN HOUR WHILE YELLING "I GOTTA ASSERT DOMINANCE"
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