nah, its part of my diet to keep track of the servings of everything i put into my body
how many servings is brandon's dick?
She told me I had to leave by four. We fucked until six thirty and we are the champions played on the way home. Yeah god knew
It's "your husband had his mouth on my vagina" awkward.
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
Just got home and found him passed out with his ass stuck in a Rubbermaid garbage can. He must have been like that for a few hours
I'll be there soon. I expect Advil and a bucket of kittens when I arrive.
Cops on bikes. I think I can outrun them.
I'm just gonna use that pot butter as dip for chips. That's fat, American AND stoner!
The more I drank he just got hotter and hotter. And then the mustache didn't look too bad
My life is literally "I'm too horny you can't leave" or "let's have pie" there's like no inbetween
Just keep your throat open and beer will always find its way in.
I also farted in bed this morning and said, "I don't even care. My body deserves that."
What's the tour de bar? Is that a thing, or is it just what you call Saturdays?
Hold on I'll be right there, I can't find my arm.
Her blowjob technique? Picture someone attempting to drink a triple thick milkshake through a Capri Sun straw.
Randomize
