I'm already going to be stripping so like pretty much you would just be watching me. Also we're watching twilight. again.
I'll forget this but out at 4am with a lesbian model at lil waynes bday party for the record
I bet they all look and smell like Amy Winehouse
So i got in my car, the seats are leaned back, and soft soul music is playing. Wtf happened last night.
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I didn't think it was possible for the human body to be physically dependant on weed until I moved in with this kid
If we were to wake in ur bed together, what are the 3 words you would say to me?
Get out now.
She's either too fat to type, hammered or has terrible spelling.
A gay black guy with blonde hair and a gold tooth just told me he would shit on my face.
Now it's a party.
You might not want to come home tonight. Mom just found your vibrator and now she won't stop sobbing and holding a framed picture of you as a little kid.
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tonight were gonna drink champagne and watch girls put themselves in awkward position
Was the first guy that bit your neck last night wearing a trenchcoat...I have a vague memory.
I don't know if I'm feeling really nervous right now or just extremely horny.
I'm gonna have to shit in a bar again tonight
If you binge watch Bill Nye Saves the World without me you can consider yourself single
I don't want to date him...I just want him to cheat on his girlfriend with me.
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