She thought I was gay, so I told her I'd be more comfortable with anal. She agreed.
I just had to ask my dad for money to pay for my birth control. I've hit financial rock bottom.
and then he tried plucking my nose hairs. lines were crossed.
Turns out lunch break sex with someone you cant stand being around for any amount of time just makes you wish you had gone to get tacos like you originally planed.
I don't believe in coincidence. I believe in the stars aligning perfectly to sodomise me in public. Who ever said I was cynical?
I'm treating this like a real date. My boobs aren't even out.
I'm so proud, I have tears
I wore a bird inflatable and still got laid. So there's that.
Hooked up with a guy that looked like Dean Thomas. Mediocre at best, but I stopped myself from calling him Dean in bed. So I got that going for me.
She's passed out laying in the middle of the street. Cars are honking at her and going around her body. We need to stop playing BONECRUSHER.
I washed my sheets. I did out of respect for my previous and current sexual partners.
No it's like. I don't respect you. And I think you're a terrible person but. I still wanna bone it out.
Our lives are a motherfucking joke
COCAINE IS GR8
He fucked me for my Netflix login, I fucked him for his HBO login, and actually I think that's beautiful
she hand cuffed me to the bed naked, jumped off the dresser naked, hit her head on the fan and knocked herself out. when her mom came home i had to call her for help, she could have died man...
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