I just got called an ass for saying no thanks to a Greenpeace solicitor. I don't want the whales to die but I do want Greenpeace to fail. Conundrum.
Peanut Butter and turkey sandwich...this may come back to haunt me
There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
Is it bad that I just used Smirnoff as mouthwash?
He wants to know how I lost my bra in his pants....id like to know too
I need input, can I pre-game my cat scan?
There's some muscle relaxers in my bedside table. Sorry if my dildo is in the bathroom.
The little girl I babysit saw pink plastic shot glasses in my car and asked what they were for and I told her they were princess teacups.
I built a fence. For the bunnies we're going to adopt. I'll fill you in when you get home.
If I die, let him know that his penis was the last penis I saw. And I'm happy about that.
I was wondering why are people staring at me til I realized I was bra-less with a lei around my neck
Why do I have this feeling like this is heading in a slightly threesome-y direction
are you drinking tonight?
I have an exam tomorrow
so yes.
Should we make a shared Google doc list of places we want to fuck? Like a scavenger hunt?
i just used your hair clip to unclog my bong. i miss you so much!
Randomize