Her little brother was home, so we had to hook up while playing hide and seek with him
I'm okay.. I had a good heart to heart with the cab driver Raheem - it's going to be our year.
There is a limo involved. Man up, and make yourself puke. Its only one more night of blacking out.
Hne relally is a cite oerfect gome. Nes awddddddddooooome.
She asked the taxi driver to stop at the Texaco because she had to puke. She did then stumbled into the gas station and bought a 40.
i told you that I felt like my feet were melting into the ground and you starting blowing on them to put out the "invisible fire". thanks friend.
The last thing I remember was doing a line in the shape of Texas
You wore a man's plastic top hat last night.
No I didn't. Whiskey did.
Sometimes crazy just comes naturally. I don't need booze to say that on occasion I feel the need to rip off my asshole and throw it against the fridge to see if it sticks.
Me and this 7 year old almost finished a large pizza. And when I say me and this 7 year old I really mean me.
As I was sneaking out of his house last night his moms lover was sneaking in, he held the door for me...
I'm sitting here listening to fat joe and doing kegels I have given up
One less thong to worry about.
One less *thing! But probably that too.
Heard flapping noises behind me. It was my roommate flapping her bathrobe like wings, saying "I'm a faaaiiiiry."
If I could tell my younger self three things it would be: 1. Smoke a lot more weed 2. Have a lot more sex 3. Own a good set of pots and pans
Randomize
