She just messaged me 19 sad faces.
Pray the makeout fairy visits me this weekend.
Dont even try and act like it wasn't you who made the sex tape of my dogs.
I have realized now that neither the top nor bottom of a bunk bed is safe for sex....
Legit I think I might have gotten hepatitis C from licking the window of that last cab.
You kicked in the door when she was blowing him. You dont remember do you?
We had sex and then he fed me pie. This is the best friends-with-benefits situation ever.
how was it?
he was petting the bushes because they were "napkins"
It was awful. Their identical twins so it was like having sex with Jeff wearing a wig and shaved legs.
Good because ass is like 60% of my diet now
some kid lit a j in the bar tonight. i was in awe of both his boldness and the severe beatdown he received moments later
Just busted the chick who slept with my boyfriend with alcohol. God I love being an RA.
There. Isnt. A. Single. Person. Who. Is. Not. High. At. Church.
Does this mean I have to put a bra on now
my friends roomated asked me this morning if we went to mcdonalds last night and i had no idea...that is until i checked my purse and found half a mcdouble in it...
Randomize
