How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
I peed while puking? Even better
Yes you most deff did. Ultimate multi tasker you are
will power is for people who don't want to get laid
he was so excited that he found the elusive clitoris. i was like look christopher colombus, just because you found it doesnt mean you knew what to do with it
19 People Who Had An Inappropriate Celebrity Encounter
i'm naked playing bejeweled blitz in your bed. this is both a forewarning and an apology
her sex was completely horrible but her weed was great. imma ask her out again
Woke up in the front yard with a chalupa and a firecracker in my back pocket. It's what the founding fathers would want
You stumbled in the house, mumbled something about a cheese party, grabbed a block of cheese and the whiskey, and left.
I NEED ANOTHER LEVEL OF CAPS TO EXPRESS TO YOU THE MAGNITUDE OF MY FADDEDNESS
21 Awkward Ways People Found Out Their Partner Was Into Outrageous Sex Acts
animal crackers drenched in taco bell mild sauce... surprisingly delightful
breakfast of champions
breakfast of stoners
One day. I will touch his hair. I'm curious if it'll be like a soft cloud.
i should probably stop thinking with my vagina, and start using that $70, 000 education i can't afford. what the fuck.
Guess I was throwing darts at a patrons head last night, lol! Black out
I ACCIDENTALLY HOOKED UP WITH A GUY WHO HAS A NICHOLAS CAGE POSTER ABOVE HIS BED I CANT HANDLE LIFE.
The universe is either telling you 1. you make terrible decisions or 2. its time to let go of your hatred of Cage.
I just wanted to be the best at what I did even if that included sexing a whole fraternity or sorority ya know?