I gave her the chance to be interesting and she failed. So then I gave her a chance to be slutty and she failed at that too.
she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
What a good family we'd make, him and I and our kids and his good dick.
you humped every kiosk in the store. then you asked for an application.
Am I texting you while being used as a stripper pole by two half-naked women? hint: I am.
Road construction signs are deceptively heavy
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
When we were fucking he said and I quote "we're like a sex fajita"
I'm shoveling snow with a camel-pack full of beer in a blizzard. I love snow days as an adult!!!
I just overheard this sorority girl saying "It's like trick or treting but for alcohol and with no costumes." I'm jealous.
what better to celebrate not being pregnant than to eat a bowl full of rum soaked pineapples?
We're currently sharing pics of our cats. I can't wait to sit on her face.
I'd love you more if you were covered in hot cheetos
also, my mom just called to make sure the dick tattoo on your arm was fake..
Dude how about today while I was on lunch someone died in the break room at work....I didn't even know we had a break room!!
Randomize
