i'm sure her mom would have loved to find out her daughter has herpes via facebook
he is naked. in. my. bed. happiest day. of my. LIFE.
Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
My walk of shame was far more interesting today. He's moving and was cleaning out his apartment, so not only was I carrying my clothes, I also walked away with 4 bottles of cheap wine and a jar of ragu.
Playing hide and seek with all those cheeseburgers... Not our finest moment.
I've taken to hiding pictures of us around his room so that he'll forever feel guilty for dumping me on Valentine's Day... And to potentially cock block any hook ups.
Having vodka and cokes for lunch at work today because absolutely ZERO fucks are being given.
Just found weed in my belly button. Happy Saturday!
I plan on having so much gay sex in our house while you gone.
Seriously. All I want right now is a 40 with a nipple on it, and a nap
Naked and Afraid: Hangover edition
It was a simpler time. With fewer STDs.
Eating pizza in the bath tub while watching a romantic comedy alone. I reached a new level of single.
so on a scale from morning glass of wine to that time i burnt the garage down how drunk were you last night
About 'lets tie a boat to a truck and ride it down the freeway'
Made it to the top o the stairs ALIVE YES FUCJ YOU GRAVITY
Randomize
