i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
I wish scraping a resin bowl could be considered cleaning.
turns out they were just sand fleas, not crabs.. thank you random mexican girl from padre who's name i can't pronounce
the liquor store owner came out from behind the counter and kissed my cheek when he saw that i am back for fall semester
We're all in the kiddie pool on the porch. Fully clothed. Watching porn. With my manager.
just had to sit in the middle of an aisle in stop and shop because we're too hungover and needed to take a break.
That just sounds like a recipe for sex in my backyard. Yes.
Mom just posted ur drunk pix from Cancun in the newly made "My not-so-fantastic son" album. Thought you should know.
My "Week Of Not Checking Into OK Cupid So I Don't Hook Up With Another Fat Chick" lasted four hours. On the plus side, she was the smallest one yet.
I love you more than champagne and correct grammar
I have no idea. I think this is what happens when people take drugs in the middle of the day
By the way I got my period today. No NHL babies for me.
Plus, I have my cousin, the dominatrix, to help me out if things get out of hand
I might go bald with this hair pulling thing every night.
You told his date she had the tits to be a stripper and the personality to be the pole. Of course he's pissed off.
Randomize
