i thought i deleted your number from my phone...Wtf
Yeah, we realized keeping you in a cage wasn't beneficial to us
For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
i just set an alarm for noon. fuck yes winter break.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
This is a dangerous game of "whose life is more pathetic".
Sorry for feeding you peanuts last night while you were sleeping, you looked hungry.
Like I couldn't describe it to you but if they did a lineup of penises i'd be able to pick it out.
Woke up to a break up text for a facebook relationship I didn't even know I was in... 2012 is going to be a good year
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I resisted the temptation to hold the cake in one hand to alternate bites with the ruffles I was eating. I decided that might make me look dysfunctional.
The bottle of Wild Turkey is empty and there is a pile of wet cement in the garage. What happened?
I think there's a problem with society when I'm shopping for lingerie and I think "man some of these would make kickass shirts"
Rigtt?!
He's like... An octopus that touches my vagina in all these diff ways at the right times. It's almost unsettling
You know she's gonna fuck shit up when she shows up in a neon wind-suit
You know that thing where you wouldn't typically eat ass but you're in love with him so you want to eat his ass, because it's HIS ass
Randomize