she really just asked how mermaids reproduce.
I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
I make my boyfriend pay for half of my birth control. We call it his monthly rent.
I wish the health center treadmills counted beers burned not calories
I don't remember coming home but there is cereal EVERYWHERE
you asked "if this appropriate to take the the bathroom?" while holding up a bottle of vodka when you went to pee.
Haha, you kept saying the cop was going to give you a ride home b/c "that's his job, it's summer."
There should be a rule.......that if you have a small penis you must wear a hat with propellers on it so you can fly the hell off the planet.
I think once you know a guy's chest measurements the stalking has gone too far..
I just made a drug deal 100% through snap chat
I can tell right now that knowing you will either be really fun or ruin my life
I told her I was going to sleep early last night. I probably should not have sent that snapchat of us playing beer pong.
I witness him finger a girl behind the dj decks yet I'm still going to meet up with him. Wtf is my life
It's a sad night when one of your friend texts you that she's going on a date with someone you know and then invites you to maybe have a drink after
Why did two squirrels just run out from behind the couch?
About that.
Randomize
