The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
i just shit 3 out of the 4 types of matter
oh man. maybe i should puke on his dick? just to test how much he loves me?
My TA just asked me why I was late to class. How do I say because I was having the best orgasm of my life in Arabic?
love being home for thanksgiving just had grandma pick me up from the frat by her house
I know it's pride week, but your asshole is just never supposed to taste like banana.
I think we should have realized the night was going to be nuts when it started with a bum dying in front of my house.
You know this who 'I show my love by being a total dick' thing is getting old, right?
He's living a porn movie. He's slept with a waitress at her work for lunch, a bar tender at the bar that night, and the cleaning lady the next morning.
Do you remember trying to make pizzas with the domino workers last night...while trying to speak their language with them.. spanish?
I'm dying. The alcohol is viciously exiting my tiny body.
Nothing says besties like laying naked in bed hungover arguing over who is getting the pants
When the hubs wants to wear his training mask during sex and pretend to be Bane you just go with it.
WHY DID YOU NOT OFFER TO LET HIM STAY
Dude, it's like you want him inside me more than i do
Well, if you do die, I'll bedazzle your coffin.
Randomize
