Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
can we please take bets on how much therapy you'll need in the future?
I mean, he was my book buddy in 1st grade. The kid taught me how to read, the least I could do was give him head.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
20 yrs from now I just want to barge in her house and yell at her kids, "I took ur moms virginity!"
Just drunk tweeted NASA asking them to give me a lift home in one of their spaceships. Fingers crossed
I'm drinking sangria out of a sand pail. I'll pass on tonight
Ya I painted "STOP TRYING ANAL" on her headboard. I'm sick of listening to her whine through the wall and bitch the next day.
How can I explain how nice he is to you? ...like, I'm going to have to have my world famous why being a douche is sexy talk.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I thought my period ended but I felt it again as soon as Pitbull started playing
Are you wearing clothes?
Fuck no, who do you think I am
Most girls get hit on with a $7.00 drink. You get hit on with a $750K plane.
I have a bottle of vodka wrapped in a leg warmer in my purse. This is what it takes to get through Christmas with my family.
He yelled "CARLI LLOYD" and then kicked the cake off the table. Soccer is making monsters out of us.
My puke in the shower morning just turned into a puke in the restroom at work afternoon. I'm the human embodiment of dumpster fire.
Randomize