he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
Thought you might like this. Had a dance off with an andy bernard look alike and pissed my bed. All in one night.
they said he just opened the front of his shirt and threw up alll over himself
Omg calling you in 10 to update you on who I peed on last night
casually drinking alone with your cats. do they like sparks?
my dad just told me he found me on the kitchen floor saturday morning with a microwave dinner on top of me, fork still in hand. priceless
I'm babysitting my fucking roommate he took out the screen and is trying to throw dishware in our fucking pool after he repelled off our balcony
welp wont be popping out a kid with a beret. frenchie is gone and the mother nature showed herself. bilingual kid can be erased from the bucket list
did you see me getting spanked by that lady cop who was a guy?
I showed him my toy collection and he goes, "You won't need those anymore," and dropped his pants. I threw the House of Pleasure out last night.
But you put your finger in my ass and the rest is history
we've talked on the toilet we're linked now
Sorry i ignored you for so long. I think my vibrator is broken.
Dude, exfoliate your balls. you'll thank me later.
Do plants get herpes?
who is this
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