found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
jersey shore has given me a vivid depiction of what things will be like for me once i get to hell
i got totally wasted at 2pm and cleaned the house bc i was bored. my mom now supports my alcohol problem
conquered wheelchair sex. it's rather convenient. you'd think it was made for it, with all those handles and adjustable features.
he told me he was a chubby chaser.. then winked. i'm signing up for a gym pass as we speak
I really don't think you should have 'baptized' your tattoo in vodka the same night you got it.
Heard puking from next door. Looks like the third floor won't be any different than the second.
I gave him head in my cape. On the kitchen floor. Watching a show about bacon.
I'm hiding in a cabinet. I'm going to stay here.
wait can you just like go into detail with this penis touching thing? like was it a hand job or was it like a day at the petting zoo or something
Yuck. My throat feels like someone chucked a couple of Maltov cocktails down it and finished it off with a super soaker filled with Jameson.
I need to pay that drinking in public ticket, but I also really want to get a spray tan next week... so priorities.
No it'll be my boobs and the luge part will be from my nipples. Everyone will be sucking beer from my perfectly sculpted and partially melted tits.
I think I caught your cold through my vagina. It was worth it.
I think I just sharted jello shots
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