i'm pretty sure you said "blowjob marathon" lastnight
i totally said that
Last night, you attempted to motor boat my vagina then proceeded to blow raspberries on it. Don't ever do that again.
you are the best fuck buddy i could have, all the others get feelings and morals involved
It's like if you got one of your titties chopped off...think of how much one would miss the other...that's how I feel when we're apart. A tit with no twin.
Just pretend you're riding a unicorn through space. Thats how I deal with the stirrup situation at the gyno office.
Mistakes were made. Hot mistakes that I want to make again. But tapping your employee is def a mistake. Esp in front of two other employees.
Two big black bouncers picked you up and escorted you to the elevator.
I didn't even do anything wrong. For all they knew I could have been on the US Olympic Gymnastic team. Would they kick Gabby Douglas out of a bar? I don't think so.
Exactly best part of my night he took of his shirt and surprise traveler fanny pack
I've got to stop being so hungover that I puke in the fine establishments of this glorious town.
He's gonna be like you slept with too many of my friends and you're being voted off the island haha
The assignment was about the Industrial Revolution so I just screamed at them in a British accent all day. No, they didn't know I was hungover.
Fuck you. You were a total asshole last night.
We will get to that, but can anybody tell me whose fucking socks I am wearing?!
Emojis can't explain what he felt when that ass dropped
I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but yours is no longer the biggest penis I've seen. It is however, still the prettiest.
I don't want to be flamboyant (says the guy who bought a hot pink suit to be a flamingo for Halloween)--but I don't mind being a little extra.
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