So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
dude you cant keep breaking into my house just to raid my fridge.. especially at 3AM.
So I realized I'm not completely sober when the automatic toilet flushed and I screamed
I didn't know what to do with her so I just tied her to a bench.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's ok, I may have just peed outside your car and used your whataburger napkins. Hope you weren't saving them for a special occasion.
Russian roulette. Between salvia and weed. You in?
FUCK YOU MAN
Now if u will excuse me I have to go prep my vagina for this amazing sex filled weekend I'm about to encounter
I would lick a homeless mans crack teeth for a cup of coffee right now.
She waited 7 months to break out her comicon costumes. I was only mad it took her so long. I fucked an elf last night and strawberry shortcake the night before!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
One of the art pieces was basically this chick throwing raw meat at the audience, anyone who got hit (which I did) got a free shot of whiskey. It was worth it.
Threw up in hyvee parking lot. Thanksgiving shopping complete.
I'm in Home Depot and I can feel the straight bob the builders staring at me. I bet it's like I have a rainbow arrow pointing at me.
I have booze and I wanna give you a bj. How can you be mad at me?
I'm like the kinda excited when David After Dentist stands up in his seat, screams, and collapses
We blew shit up to. With a cannon.
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