i miss you so much
i miss you too
oops, did i send that to you? i meant to send it to the money you owe me
Check if I'm alive tomorrow. If not, tell my parents I died happy and that there's a gay cheerleader in the spare bedroom
you know whats weird about having a girlfriend....I look forward to masturbating now....sort of like quality me time.
absolutely not. he will always be that kid that threw up a ham and cheese sandwich in fourth grade to me.
Dude...I'm drunk from Wednesday stilll.
just left a line of flour and citric acid on the dresser for my roommate to find. teach that bastard to steal my coke!
His apartment number was 69. I had to.
ive realized i need to start an "avoid moving in with my parents after graduation" fund
If I am going to throw out this whole "born again virgin" thing...i'm not going to do it on someone who is less than 5 inches.
There is a 15" subwoofer mounted inside our fridge. I've never been more proud of myself.
On monday, while we were having crazy monkey sex, I earned $82. Vacation pay rocks.
Ps. I feel like I may pee myself this weekend. Either drunkenly or out of excitement. Toss up
this lady just pulled corn on the cob out of her purse
People like that make this world a better place.
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
Thanks for putting up with my drunk friend last night. Its all fun and games till someone pukes macaroni under your fridge.
Randomize