Every time you buy a sobe you buy a bong.
it's not gay if you rub your penis between their butt cheeks and pretend they are tits
my mind is a poorly written porno when i'm drunk.
he was already passed out before we got there, so i already knew i was going to like him
Dude...disintegrating condoms. Think about it. For all the guys that wanna go raw dog but their girls won't let them, and for the girls that wanna get pregnant but their guys don't want a kid. What do you think?
I think you've been hitting the soco too hard again.
Don't judge me. If you're going to fall off a bed you might as well do it gracefully into a bag full of beer.
Had sex five times today because there was nothing else to do. I had no idea snow days could get even better than when we were kids
THIS IS NO TIME FOR SHAME JOSH. JUST GOTTA GET IT IN. PURELY FOR LEVELING UP PURPOSES
Really? A fat girl?
I'm walking her back. Chill out.
She is a nice girl okay. For some reason we are in my room though.
If a cougar buys you pizza and wants to show you her newly-won house, you have sex with her. It's the law. Just being all the man I can be dude
I knew it was going to be a good night when my mom said "Have fun, be safe...wait, do you need any weed for tonight?"
I could not handle jail. And my very angry parents.
He has a burner phone just to send dick pics. It's revolutionary
Yeah plus that night got so disgusting it's basically a repressed memory anyway
Dude chill patience is a virtue.
WHY DOES PATIENCE HAVE TO BE A VIRTUE, WHY CAN'T HURRY THE FUCK UP BE A VIRTUE?
Randomize
