Dont worry, she is sitting right next to me. She is making it clear she wants to scissor
My sis friend said it was fake then described it as "scary"...greatest adj ever applied to my dick
I think in growing up..I've been having a hard time masterbating to fictional characters
its simple. when his lips are on my clitoris i want to marry him. when they are speaking i want to kill him.
I spent my night drunkenly staring at a picture of John Stamos. How do you think I feel?
I'm pretty sure my penis yawned halfway through. That loose.
Living room yoga. I'm too hungover to deal with anyone else's chi today.
She has an inverted nipple. She told to play with the normal one until the other one pops up.
I just looked into the eyes of the man whose car I peed on last night
Making drunken Mac n cheese at 3 am I understand why witches constantly stir their cauldrons. Much more homogenized temperature and slim chance of boiling over. Good job witches.
Please come and kill me with a brick you dont even have to be nice about it just smash myfucking skull in this is the worst hangover ive had for at least a week
I consider my hand a solid 5. So if I'm dipping below a 7.5, I might as well go with old faithful.
You came down the stairs dressed as winnie the pooh and kicking cups off the table and out of people's hands
I was told that I need a reference for my blow job skills. Be expecting a phone call tomorrow.
Mom says you're allowed to come home if you replace the towels. I don't want to know why.
Randomize
