i just got a fart via voicenote. blackberry has officially changed history.
you had sex with a 30 year old who doesn't have a cell phone but does have an 8 year old son.
he's 29.
So, do you know where my left shoe is? I mean, we were at a few places last night, and I called them. No luck for me.
wanna get hammered and throw tomatoes at the people standing in line for the midnight showing of harry potter and yell whichcraft is evil
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we went to get a refill in his room and ended up having sex and passing out. then he woke me up with sex and gave me a beer for breakfast. i never want this to end
Also, just almost microwaved cereal. Thank god mom is here to stop me.
I cried and ate like 6 tacos in the taco bell parking lot at almost midnight, sober, alone, listening to a demi lavato cd. And that was the good part.
Women are fucking wierd. I have forgotten this. Divorce papers should come with a handbook.
This is stressing me out. I feel like I need to eat the dick.
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I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.
I tried to celebrate Halloween, Thanksgiving, Hannukah, and New Years all in one night.
The owner was showing me around and pointed at one of the bars and said "this is the one you're allowed to dance on. I could tell you wanted to ask." DREAM JOB.
I just fell in love with a beard, the guy it's attached to isn't great but I think I'm going to take one for the team
You know darned well I have a well-documented weakness for redheads, Subway and hand-drawn graphic novels.
How are you and your magical vagina doing today?
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