I'm so disappointed in myself I can actually taste it.
Does it taste like semen?
Im surprised putting the throwing knife "dartboard" next to the door didnt end up worse
its warm now so i can go back to sleeping with guys based on their fuckability rather than how much warmth they generate.
Traded my phone for pizza, then got it back this morning....successful night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If you need us, Zoe and I will be on my kitchen floor drinking Gatorade and crying
Yes, yes I will fake crap in his house for you.
Finally had sex in the new kitchen. Burnt the hamburgers and hit myself in the face with the freezer door. Worth it.
I think he's like Cher he's going to live forever but not as scary looking
he told me he didn't like my name so he was going to call me Casey instead
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just poured two shots of fireball into my Rapunzel mug I love finals.
Just letting you know that I just spent 11 dollars on a car wash... Because you had sex in my car.
You like pics of my balls that much?
I am at the store looking at frames as we text...
Decided to stay in tonight. Completely sober. Just got two drunken booty calls within 5 minutes of each other. This is my life.
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
She sent a group text pic called "Assemble" of his dick next to her forearm.
I'm down.
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