New discovery: doing the Helen Keller is not as attractive as I thought it would be, in reference to the sex noises.
Even Lady Gaga hates Purdue
Not even close. I woke up in the bed of Codys truck. Wrapped up in a sleeping bed, using a stuffed alligator as a pillow. And Alex was laying naked beside me. Not to mention I wasn't wearing the clothes I got there in.
Has now officially visited every ER in this city in one semester.
I was short on money so I let my roommate mase me for $60
It was technically 11... But I go by McDonald's time, if they aren't servin breakfast, it's the afternoon. Therefore I can drink
You cannot meet up with him at the tailgate, his parents are there. What are you going to say "Hi I'm the one who fucks your son, can I get a cheeseburger?"
Just had to double check that I had pants on. THAT kind of weekend.
How I know we're old. Don knows the owner. The owner said 'How about some shots?' We said no thanks. He looked puzzled and came back later and said 'You know it's on the house?' We said 'Yeah, no thanks.'
Can I drink yet?
It's Monday morning.
Your point?
I can't believe I watched you put a tampon in in the parking garage
You told me not to tell you found out you're pregnant..
woke up hungover this morning lying in a water raft covered in water.. i dont know if i should consider this good or bad
So, I just found out Ireland, is #1 in binge drinking. I know its Sunday but this one is for America.
I am mildly hung over. Decided pants are very unnecessary right now.
Randomize
